Let a :-) Be Your Umbrella

Our family spends a lot of time, particularly in the summer, at garage sales and book sales. Garage sales are popular at least in part due to the availability of cheap second-hand toys -- often the "guys" of which I wrote some time ago -- but we're all always on the lookout for books as well. I'm afraid the kids are more enthusiastic about owning books than reading them, but I'd rather go way overboard in the quest to make them lovers of reading.

And yes, I did say "we're" always on the lookout; I rarely buy a book that I can't get for free at the library (unfortunately, we have some trouble with due dates around here, so even the library ain't free, but then...), but on occasion I stumble across a gem I know I've got to have for keeps. Such was the case recently when I found a used copy of Eats, Shoots, and Leaves.

Since I have a somewhat unusual sense of humor and a love for language -- and I'm a bit of a pain in the keister -- this is unquestionably the book for me. She writes with what is called, in almost every review (and there are over 500 extremely assertive reviews, both pro and con, at amazon.com), "biting wit" about the use and misuse of punctuation.

I admit that blogs as a whole are not thought of as bastions of grammar, syntax, spelling, or punctuation -- and my blog punctuation may seem a tad idiosyncratic. In point of fact I am so OCD about such issues that I've even leveraged it into a part-time role in my other gig (the one I'm actually paid for (should that be "the one for which I'm actually paid"?) ); I'm the editor for one of my department's newsletters, so my word on commas, dashes and semi-colons is law.

Scary, huh?

So anyway, I was reading along chortling the chortle of the guy who knows he's on the right side of the battle against the punctuation evildoers. Then the smug rug got snatched out from under me when she turned her scorn laser upon... emoticons.

Forget the idea of selecting the right words in the right order and channelling the reader's attention by means of artful pointing. Just add the right emoticon to your email and everyone will know what self-expressive effect you thought you kind-of had in mind.

Don't get me wrong; I know emoticons aren't cool. My problem is that in my business life, I conduct an enormous percentage of my interpersonal exchanges are via instant message or e-mail. And for better or worse, I don't consistently suppress my sometimes-inscrutable wit.

I find that my variety of humor, if I may be permitted to describe it as such, is extremely oral -- dependent upon emphasis, pacing, volume and the like... every possible nuance of spoken language. Emoticons can be helpful in that regard, along with all the other tricks I use such as boldface; italics; and, as already confessed, my somewhat quixotic punctuation.

At work I have frequent recourse to emoticons (and delight in collecting new varieties ), not least because I spend a lot of time conversing with casual acquaintances. And for some reason, I have a particular genius -- I like to think of it as genius, at least -- for saying/typing things that are very funny... unless you interpret them a little differently than I intended, at which point they make you angry.

The irony that struck me not long ago is that I use emoticons much more in my IMs than I use smiles, or maybe even expressions, on my own actual face. Boy, I've said some unflattering things about myself in this space, but that's gotta be in the top 10!

I'm working on balancing that ratio... I'm trying to use fewer emoticons . But I think it might also be a good idea for me to be a bit more expressive; I can point to at least one person who'd appreciate that. In fact, I'm pointing at her right now.

So if you're out and about, and you run into someone who looks like this , stop by and say hi.