Read the Verse Again

Years ago, when my wife was teaching in the public school, she came home on a Friday, amazed at what she'd seen. She had stopped in the office to pick up her check, but was told the checks were delayed till the following Monday.

The outcry from her colleagues was loud: how could they make it till Monday without their checks? And while we were both aware, then and now, that there are plenty of folks who are getting by from check to check, we were a bit stunned by the idea of well-paid professionals who couldn't forego their pay for three days.

That spoke to a somewhat different attitude toward money than I have, for sure. Even when I was a kid, if someone handed me a dollar, I'd stuff it right into my bank (however, if someone gave me a dime, I took it right to the drugstore down the street and bought a pack of baseball cards).

As I matured -- OK, got older, at least -- and got a few more dollars to play with, I didn't change the way I thought about money very much. When I commuted to college, and later in the working world, I always packed a lunch (incidentally, working folks who buy lunch regularly might as well cut a hole in their pockets). If I saw a magazine I liked, I'd go back to the store 2 or 3 times to make sure it was worth the $2.95. And once I discovered the Entertainment Book, we never ate out anywhere unless it was buy one/get one.

This made loads of sense when we first got married; I was competing in the World's Worst Waiter reality competition, and my wife was still in school, so we were not rolling in it. She was keeping a budget book, like a prudent new bride, recording every penny that went in & out, and I finally had to make her stop. Month after month of going in the hole while not spending much more than rent and a little food had put her on edge -- good thing I still had all those dollars from when I was a kid.

Later, she got that teaching job, and even though I was only teaching part-time, we had (for a young childless couple) a very comfortable income. So of course, being altogether unencumbered, we ate out all the time and took frequent vacations....

No, we didn't. We stayed close to home and ate lots of hot dogs and just generally behaved as if we were going broke. Looking back from here, it's hard to imagine what we were thinking; we could have had a lot of fun. It did keep us in practice for when my wife quit her job and went to seminary, of course -- about a 70% family income cut.

Since she is now a pastor and I'm up to 3/4 time at a very generous pay rate, we're now in a spot where we don't have money concerns. I don't say that in a boastful way; we recognize that we've been crazy-blessed by God, and we try to give back. However, I did want to assert that I have....

I can't even say it. OK: Changed! Over the years I've come to terms with it: it's just money, and it doesn't do any good whatsoever sitting in the bank (especially at the interest rates we're getting these days!). But it's kind of awkward because not all of our friends & family are in the same boat. We want to help, and I'm actually enjoying the opportunity to be generous, but I'm also very sensitive to others' feelings. I don't want anyone to feel I'm trying to big-time them.

Some time back we met some out-of-town friends for lunch halfway in the middle. We had been missing them so we invited them out for pizza, and since we invited I quite contentedly picked up the check. As kind folks with impeccable manners, they were grateful; but I did feel like they thought it an extraordinary gesture. I just did it because I could, and because I'm finally understanding the joy of giving... and because it was the best investment of 20 bucks or so I could imagine: I got back way more than I spent.

It's probably a relief to those around me that I really can change in some aspects. We know that Scripture gets misused all over the place, but perhaps nowhere worse than this: "Money is the root of all evil." People claim all the time that money is bad and sometimes it's thought to be more spiritual to be poor. I can't truthfully say I've ever been poor, but I've certainly had struggles, and I don't think I was way more spiritual. What the verse actually says, for those unaware, is this: "The love of money is the root of all kinds of evil." No question it can pull you off-course... but I thank God he's allowed me to learn you can have money without it having you.