Keeping in Touch

I tend to write a lot of these entries when we're at camp. I think that's because camp always gives me the sensation of being off the grid. Granted, we're not pitching a tent by a campfire -- in fact, when my father-in-law saw the place, he was affronted. "That's not a camp, it's a house," he said. I think he thought we were putting on airs. Trust me, it's a comfortable place, but not exactly HGTV's Dream Home.

We've got electricity and heat and running water and beds.... we even have a TV, even though we only get about 1 1/2 channels. I suppose what makes it feel so isolated, even rustic, is the absence of the constantly-ringing phone.

We had no way to be contacted at all until we broke down and got a cell phone; however, that number is pretty closely guarded. If I had my way, I'd only give it out written on rice paper, so anyone who had to call us could immediately swallow the evidence.

I just realized that might not matter, since a caller using his own cell phone would have the number stored... but I like the image in the last paragraph, so I left it in.

All that made me think (once again) about the state of communications in the present age. I'm well aware that (a) I obsess about this a little, and (b) when I get going on this subject, I sound like a survivor of the Spanish-American War or something. I'm not that old; every house I've ever lived in has had indoor plumbing -- although that was by no means a foregone conclusion for a preacher's kid growing up in the '60s.

I am, however, old enough to remember the days when you called someone on the telephone (which was a black plastic instrument with a heavy metal dial you had to spin just right to dial the correct number), and if they weren't home, it rang and rang till you hung up and tried again later. As I recall, that was a bit frustrating, but somehow we coped.

The next step was the answering machine. Now you didn't have to remember to call back. When the other person arrived home (or remembered to check the machine, anyway), they'd get your message and call you back. Or not, of course.

Then came the pager, which at least allowed you to let someone know immediately that you wanted to speak to them. Some of the folks at my wife's first church occasionally got frustrated that she wasn't home when They Needed Her, so they suggested she get a pager. You will not be surprised to learn that the thought of 24x7x365 availability did not fill her with joy, and she gracefully declined.

Now of course it's the cell phone era, so much so that even I, not a huge booster, am astonished when someone doesn't have one. Or for that matter, access to e-mail. I try desperately not to be a snob, but encountering someone who's not online -- or, saints preserve us, doesn't even own a computer -- makes me feel almost sorry for them.

I have a sense that I'm one behind, and that the BlackBerry is taking this to yet another level... but as you may know, by the time this house joins that revolution, it'll be something else.

So I don't know if any of us is that important, but somehow it feels like we're forced to be so much more available these days. This might sound like a Jane Austen novel or something, but back when my wife and I were engaged, we were separated the whole summer before the wedding; we kept in touch by ... writing letters. On paper, with a pen, stick a stamp on an envelope (some of you remember). You take it to the mailbox, you start the clock. Let's see: 2 days to get there, another couple for her to write a reply, 2 days' return trip, add one more for glitches -- I should hear back in a week. From the woman I love and can't wait to marry!

Contrast that to an incident this fall. I had to get a message to a friend, so I called her home, but I must have had the number garbled because it said it was disconnected. So I called her cell & left voice mail; but then I started to think, what if she doesn't check her cell? So I sent her an e-mail, too. Punchline? She called back 3 hours later... apologetic for keeping me waiting.

If you have anything to add, feel free to send it to my work e-mail, or our home e-mail, or my Yahoo account; call us at home (leave a message at the tone & we'll get back to you as soon as we can), or on our cell; or post it to my blog.....