Christmas Performance Review

So I flunked Christmas.

OK, I don’t think I flunked, but I probably get something like a ‘C’. As a dyed-in-the wool traditionalist and all-around sentimental fool, I have a certain set of expectations for how the holiday season should go. Long-standing family traditions should be gently unwrapped and held up to the light again; children’s eyes should sparkle in wonder at the magic of the Yuletide; every secular, gift-related moment should be counterbalanced with a quiet, yet profound and heart-touching spiritual lesson on Christmas as Jesus’ birthday (my 3-year-old sinks to her knees, hands clasped in reverent prayer)….

Maybe this is just a different time, or maybe my parents’ generation was just better at this stuff (and everything else related to parenting), or maybe I just always wanted the full-body holiday experience so much that I saw something that wasn’t even there. I suppose it’s also just vaguely possible that I’ve set the expectations bar a little higher than reality can support.

In any case, if I had it to do over again, I’d:

• Spend more time reflecting on Advent. I had a very nice Advent calendar with a daily Scripture reading, which I put in my “inbox” and never saw again.
• Do more special things with the family. The Advent wreath got lit once, the angel chimes got lit once (and promptly burned down to barely-visible stubs), and we visited one nearby house to look at lights – and then only as we were on our way home from somewhere else.
• Stage-manage a little better. We had cookies for Santa (which we forgot to put out) and magic reindeer food (which we forgot to put out). Fortunately, my wife woke up with an “oops” and ran downstairs to dress up the set a little, while I tried to stall the children.
• Take seriously the concept of “some assembly required”. One of this year’s gifts was an indoor basketball hoop which, due to other commitments and a missing part, didn’t get assembled till the 28th. In addition, batteries were unsurprisingly not included, and our usual backup cache was not entirely sufficient to meet the demand. But more than anything else, I should’ve recruited some sort of Ocean’s Eleven-esque team of commandos to help break into the packaging ahead of time. Between the hermetically-sealed plastic clamshell packages (which, by the way, present razor-sharp edges if you get past the first line of defense), and the yards of wire twist-ties that bind everything to the package, it takes longer to get a toy out of the package than it did to buy it, or perhaps to manufacture it – which guarantees restless, grumpy children.

Of course, I do have to do it again. With a 6-year-old and a 3-year old, I’m guaranteed at least a half-dozen more attempts at a Christmas that’s the perfect marriage of Billy Graham and Martha Stewart.

On the other hand, maybe along the way I’ll learn to take it as it comes, not sweat the small stuff. After all, we got to spend time with friends and family, as a family. I was really proud of the gifts I got for my wife this year (all wrapped before the 24th), nothing elaborate but every one attuned to who she is and what she needs. I should mention that this was a vast improvement over the year when I got 2 weeks from Christmas with no ideas at all and had to take her shopping so she could point at things she liked – my most shameful Christmas memory!

We did actually talk about the meaning of Christmas, and though the kids still love Santa, they’re excited about Jesus too. I think one of my daughter’s favorite moments was getting to put Baby Jesus into our manger scene on Christmas morning. If nothing else, the kids got heaps of presents, and seem to enjoy playing with the ones that I’ve been able to get out of the package and find batteries for.